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who checks his blog stats like a million times a day, but doing so tonight yielded some very interesting findings! In the hour following the latest episode of Paradise Hotel (which ended at 10pm), at least fifteen people came upon my site by searching for “paradise hotel ultimate prize.” For those of you who haven’t been watching the show, up until last week there was no mention of a prize at all, and we were supposed to assume the contestants were on the show just for the joy of getting tan and drunk every week for the home viewing audience. Then, last week there was mention of an “ultimate prize” that still remains a secret. I guess all those hopeful Googlers were thinking that I had some kind of industry connection and was going to spoil the surprise for everyone savvy enough to find my site. Well, I have a few theories, if nothing else:
Theory 1: The winner will get to participate in a CELEBRITY PHOTOSHOOT for Playboy (or Playgirl) magazine. Jenna and Heidi (of Survivor VI fame) had to wait several long months before their opportunities arrived (buy it here). The bronzed beauties of Paradise Hotel are waxed, relaxed, and ready to bare it all RIGHT NOW.
Theory 2: The winner will be a VIP contestant on the next Who Wants To Marry My Dad (Mom). What could the “ultimate prize” be if not TRUE LOVE?
Theory 3: The winner will get to stay in Paradise FOREVER and NEVER LEAVE. This is what the show is about, after all. Maybe the buxom, beauty-marked, and sassily-inflected Amanda Byram will even stay to keep the lucky winner company for all eternity. “Apple mahtinis anyone?”

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