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!! OMG, it works (sort of): Electroshock therapy !!

Anyone who’s read The Bell Jar probably thinks of electroshock therapy as some outmoded, dangerous and useless piece of medical “technology” that is locked away in the annals of history never to be used again. They would be wrong.
Doctors still use it today for a variety of mental illnesses, and here’s the surprise: It works, at least for a while until you need it again.
From Ann Bauer’s Salon article:

They can’t say exactly why it works, only that it does, swiftly and consistently, in roughly 90 percent of catatonia cases, and 60-70 percent of patients with severe depression, mania and intractable psychosis. Recently, neurologists have begun recommending regular electroconvulsive therapy sessions for patients with movement disorders, such as Parkinson’s, saying that it minimizes tremors and reduces the need for drugs such as L-dopa, which has notoriously negative side effects. (ECT has proved ineffective, however, when used for dysthymia, anxiety, substance abuse and personality disorders.)

I wonder if I can get electroshock to make myself wake up before 9:30am.

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