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!! OMG, how terrifying: Evangelical Landlord !!

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RUTH STOOPS definitely would not do well at a Halifax apartment advertised for rent on Kijiji:

About us:

We are conservative, bible believing, God-fearing, born again, evangelical Christians. We interpret the bible literally in every way possible. We live a strict moral code and observe God’s laws in our everyday life. My wife stays at home and teaches our home-schooled children. I work as a pastor at a local congregation and am active in the faith community.

About you: (Tenant)

• You are employed

• You do not participate in lascivious deviant sexual behavior

• You do not choose alternative lifestyles as your lifestyle

• You do not have any criminal history

• You must have excellent character references

• You do not smoke, drink or take drugs. Mandatory drug screening required.

It gets even crazier with time limits on the “exercise yard” and I.D. bracelets. I wonder if the GOD WARRIOR moved to Halifax…?
Read the rest after the jump. Thanks to Mark for sending this in!


Available Immediately – Central Halifax – Showing Saturday and Sunday – Email for directions and additional information.
What kind of apartment is it?
• One bedroom basement apartment with separate entrance
• Tastefully decorated with modern décor
• Approximately 650 square feet
• There is even a window! Security bars installed for your safety and to prevent unauthorized activity
• Closed circuit camera installed for security and safety. One in your suite, one at the entrance, and one in the exercise yard
Rent:
• $480.00 per month
• First month’s rent + ½ month security deposit due at move in
• Small pet allowed with approval and payment of additional ½ month pet damage deposit
• One year lease permitted, option to renew lease at end of the term with no increase in rent
• LANDLORD’S SPECIAL! Move in before the 1st and don’t pay for the remainder of the month! That’s significant savings.
Included in the rent:
• Electricity
• Heat – Maintained at 21 degrees with lock box to prevent unauthorized tampering. Additional heating available for $20.00 per extra degree of heating per month. You may not use your oven to heat the apartment. If you do, you will be fined $50.00 per occurrence.
• Air conditioning – Maintained at 25 degrees during the summer with lock box to prevent extra cooling from being dispensed. Additional cooling for sale for $20.00 per degree of cooling requested per month.
• 25″ Zenith color television set with basic cable service – INCLUDED IN RENT!
• Wireless internet (with content filter applied to block forbidden/immoral websites) – INCLUDED IN RENT!
• Provision of coin laundry services – You will have your own personal coin laundry washer and dryer machines. Washers and dryers are paid using a token system. Tokens can be purchased through the landlord. Washer tokens cost $4.15 each and dryer tokens cost $3.60 each. You are not allowed to use foreign
currency or slugs in the washer and dryer. Violators will be fined $100.00 per infraction.
About us: (Landlords)
We are conservative, bible believing, God-fearing, born again, evangelical Christians. We interpret the bible literally in every way possible. We live a strict moral code and observe God’s laws in our everyday life. My wife stays at home and teaches our home-schooled children. I work as a pastor at a local congregation and am active in the faith community.
About you: (Tenant)
• You are employed
• You do not participate in lascivious deviant sexual behavior
• You do not choose alternative lifestyles as your lifestyle
• You do not have any criminal history
• You must have excellent character references
• You do not smoke, drink or take drugs. Mandatory drug screening required.
Additional Rules/Conditions:
CLEANLINESS: You are responsible for the cleanliness and orderliness of
your apartment. Beds are to be made before leaving your suite,
countertops must be wiped down, and you must remove all trash. Upon
inspection, if the tenant’s basement suite is not clean, the cost of
cleaning services plus a fine of $100.00 will be levied.
LIGHTS: The lights in your basement suite and in the day room are not to
be tampered with. If a light needs repair, report the condition to the
Landlord.
WAKE-UP: Wake up will be at 5:30am each morning. All ceiling lights in
the suite will be turned on automatically.
LIGHTS OUT: Ceiling lights in the suite will be turned off at 11:30pm.
CONTRABAND: The following items are considered contraband – alcohol, illegal drugs, tobacco, weapons, lock picking equipment. If any contraband is discovered to be in your possession, you will be subject to a minimum $1,000.00 fine. In addition, your items will be confiscated permanently. Second offense – you will be evicted without notice. A bailiff will escort you and your belongings off the premises. Your security deposit will not be returned.
SMOKING: The basement suite is non-smoking. Anyone in possession of
tobacco products of any kind or any lighter or matches, will have their
contraband items confiscated and will be fined $100.00.
INSPECTIONS: The Landlord will conduct unannounced inspections to ensure
that these rules and regulations are being followed.
VISITATION: Visitation periods will be on Saturdays and Sundays from
1:00 p.m. until 3:00 p.m. All visitors and their vehicles are subject
to search while on landlord property. Refusal to allow a search can
result in their being barred from all future visitation privileges. All
visitors must sign the Visitor’s Log. Unauthorized visitors will be
escorted from the property, and the tenant will be fined $250.00.
I.D. BRACELETS: Each tenant will be issued an I.D. bracelet with his/her
photograph. It must be worn at all times. If you lose your I.D.
bracelet or it is broken, you will be required to purchase a new one at
the nominal cost of $5.00.
EXERCISE YARD: The tenant will have access to the exercise yard in the
area to the back of the property for 2 hours per day from 4:00 pm to
6:00 pm. The tenant is not allowed to bring any personal property to
the exercise yard. Once the tenant leaves the exercise yard on a
particular day, he or she may not return. No boisterous behavior is
allowed in the exercise yard. There is no smoking allowed in the
exercise yard. Minimum fine for exercise yard infractions is $50.00.

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comments

    looks like a joke, but local boarding houses aren’t any different. they want 600 a month.. no visitors after a certain pm, doors are closed at 11pm and locked, random room searches, wake up calls at 7am.

    If this is a real ad these people are breaking several laws. You can’t put a camera in someones apartment. You can’t do random searches, or searches of any sort. If the landlord wants to inspect your unit they have to get your permission first. Landlords do not have the right to create arbitrary fines based on their morals. Your lifestyle choices and sexual behaviour are none of the landlords business and are an infringment on your human rights if they screen you based on them or even ask about them and they don’t have any authority to perform drug tests. There are several other ridiculous things about this ad like their control of the units lights and visitation hours but I think I’ve rambled on enough. If it is real those people should be locked up. If they were imprisoned at least they would be familiar with the rules.

    I read the same ad for Vancouver not Halifax, even searching keywords doesn’t bring this up under Halifax on Kijiji, even narrowing it down by the prices. This is a copycat link who someone just cut and pasted it to get everyone to read and gasp it, again. Also the “author” was at least smart enough to think of Kijiji, because the 1st one was a Craigslist Ad, where the the “Evangelical Landlord” actually complained about having his ad, removed on multiple occasions.

    Baby Tanya would be so lucky to be raised by these people. Donnnnn’t give up on baby Tanya, Donnnnn’t give up on baby Tanya.
    I

    i don’t know what the rental laws are like in halifax, but in california if landlords were that intrusive to their tenants, they’d be looking at a lot of violiations and probably paying a buttload of fines.

    OMG indeed. The “exercise yard” and “visitation periods” immediately made me think of a prison–which is what I’m sure living in that place would feel like. Maybe a disgruntled former tenant placed the ad as a parting joke.
    Visiors and their vehicles subject to search?!
    Citizen Ruth is a great film.

    Honestly, this has to be a joke. The “conditions” sound like the rules for a prison. Who in their right mind would even consider living there…webcams throughout the apartment? And random inspections for trash and cleanliness?

    Dale’s out today. YOU COLLECT CARTS.

    ok can you link to this i’m from halifax and this better be a joke…not cool at all..FINES wtf are these people smoking you can “fine” your tenants you also can’t inspect them whenever it pleases you, its called an expectation of privacy….OMG

    who in hell would rent from them?? LOL! Are they even allowed to put such “provisions”

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