You may have heard by now that Ellen Degeneres has been hired as the new judge on American Idol, replacing Paula Abdul. I love Ellen, of course, but I’m disappointed that they didn’t hire another complete lunatic to fill Paula’s six-inch heels. At least hire an alcoholic! Hell, if you wanna be all identity politics about it, they could have hired Rosie O’Donnell or Anne Heche and we could have gotten a lesbian and a lunatic. Instead we get Little Miss Perfect Lez. Courtney Love is not a lesbian but she would have been good too.
It’s truly an outrage that the producers of Idol haven’t treated Ms. Abdul like the drunk gift that she is. To mourn her official departure from the show, I give you this highlight reel of some of her most obnoxious moments from her own (underrated!) reality show, HEY PAULA.