Perusing Craigslist personal ads in the depths of your boredom is a lot like slowing down when you pass a car wreck — you welcome the reminder that, all things considered, you’re actually doing ok. At least you aren’t tangled up in a fender-bender or, say, looking for love in emotionally vacant places.
But then there are those posts that are ten-car pileups, like this one. You don’t gawk because it says something about you. That shit is just crazy. Pizzapits? PIZZAPITS?! No, Papa John, keep your pepperoni away from me.