For some reason (hunger?), Twitter-ers have taken on the pressing issue of the Everything Bagel, pointing out that this morning carbohydrate does not — in fact — contain everything. Here are some of the best rants:
This “everything bagel” is great. Has onions, poppy seeds, garlic, cheese, q-tips, Greenland, fear, sandals, wolves, teapots, crunking…
Flossing after an everything bagel is important b/c as the name implies, you don’t just have *something* in your teeth, you have every thing.
The “everything bagel” really only has like three things. Just what I want for breakfast. Lies.
You might want to scale back on calling yourself an “everything bagel.” I mean, right away I can see there are no M&M’s on here.
You call this an everything bagel?! Where are the french fries & the pizza & the pot brownie & the Taco Bell fire sauce?!