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!! OMG, how practical: 2-handed great sword !!


If you’ve been wondering how you’re going to slice through all those pig carcasses you have lying around your basement, the Cold Steel 2-handed great sword could be the solution. What reach! What sharpness! Just don’t watch this video while you’re eating lunch. (via Uncoached)

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!! OMG, Let Them Kiss: Modern Family’s Cam and Mitchell !!

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Hey, I haven’t actually seen yet it but everyone says this Modern Family show on ABC is pretty good! Chief among its charms are a gay couple named Cam and Mitchell– who are dumpy, middle aged and poorly-dressed in a way that makes them more realistic than probably any other gay people on television. (That includes reality TV gays, most of whom might as well have painted-on hair and a smooth little bump where their junk should be.) Yay!
There’s only one little problem with the gays on Modern Family: because network TV executives are still apparently being driven to work in Conestoga limousines, Cam and Mitchell haven’t been allowed an onscreen kiss. I guess a little gay peck is worse than than ten thousand Janet Jackson’s boobs and outrageous Survivor cameltoes all put together?
But because this is 2010, there’s now a crackerjack Facebook group petitioning for Cam and Mitchell’s onscreen smooch. Normally I don’t think these facebook groups are worth shit, but then again who just hosted SNL this weekend? Oh, right!
[Via Towleroad]

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!! OMG, How Sneaky: Gringo Masks !!

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Hey Mexicans, Guidos/Guidettes, Goths, sunbaked Jewish grannies from Boca, Ganguro girls and everyone else who doesn’t happen to have blond hair and skin the color of Robert Pattinson’s glittery ass: crack open a can of salsa and mix yourself up a margarita because we have a great and important surprise for you!
Gringo Masks! Happy Cinco de Mayo!!!
After all, now that existing while tan is now officially a crime in John McCain’s great state of Racistzona, it’s extra-important to be able to evade the pokey by looking super-white. And nothing says, Hey Papi, I’m legal! like a paper mask! Lucky for you, now there’s Gringomask.com, which provides a simple, no-fuss, no-muss solution to the problem of a less than lily complexion. Just print out the mask, glue a popsicle stick on it, wave it in front of your face and voila– no one would ever suspect you of habloing espaƱol!
Don’t delay! Print it out and slap it on right now and head out to enjoy your fun in the Tucson sun!
[Gringo Masks via Gothamist]

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!! OMG, How Clever: Ikea Heights !!


There’s a reason I can hardly enjoy anything anymore. Whether it’s books, teevee shows, movies or whatever, everything new seems to fall into two categories:
1) Things I wish I thought of and 2) things I did think of but didn’t get around to executing.
Either way, annoyance with my own failure gets in the way of any kind of pleasure. It’s a terrible way to live!
Ikea Heights falls into the first category, which hurts a little bit less. (Or does it hurt a little bit more? Ahh, I can’t decide!) Either way, the show describes itself as a “melodrama shot entirely in the Burbank, California Ikea without the store knowing.”
THIS IS GENIUS WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF IT? Episode One is above, the rest can be found here.
[Thanks for de Cosmos for the tip.]

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!! OMG, They’re Powerful: The Out 50 !!

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Oh, to be powerful! What I would give!
The Out Power 50 is online, and as usual I’m outraged not to be included in the ranks of movers and sashayers . As the leading (by some standards, i.e. my own!) purveyor of semi-nude pictures of male celebrities on this here World Wide Web, I would think I commanded more respect than this. But no. SNUBBED AGAIN!
People supposedly more powerful than me include:

[[ OMG, there’s more: JUMP IN to read the rest ]]

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