…and I couldn’t even bring myself to press play on this acceptance speech, because to be quite honest, I couldn’t really give two shits about the vile garbage that spews out of this bloated Oompa Loompa’s mouth – but I guess we’re gonna have to begin to, because it’s about to start affecting the entire planet!
If you’re just joining us from your slumber, and you feel like you’ve woken up into an alternate, nightmarish reality – you’re not alone! Get ready to roll back a whole lotta progress Ammurrica! If you didn’t go out and vote, or you voted for Trump and you are LGBTQ or an immigrant to America – hopefully you won’t mind when he takes back your own civil rights, cuts funding for HIV research and support, places it elsewhere (Mike Pence supports gay conversion therapy), denies your sister the right to make decisions for her own body, and deports your loved ones! And if you have it in your head that Mexicans and Muslims are the only minorities Trump’s capable of discriminating against, and you think you don’t need to be concerned or that it doesn’t apply to you, then I challenge you to consider who might be next in line on that list. Just sayin’!
Maybe you just ate something you shouldn’t have, or you drank too much last night trying to drown your sads and it’s only 9am but you’re trying to make yourself puke before work – then check out big D‘s acceptance speech above! I promise it’ll work wonders. (Oh, and is it just us, or does he look a bit worried?)