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!! OMG, what in Avril-Lavigne-Hot-Topic-mall-punk Hell is happening here… !!

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Whoever the out-of-touch cartoonist is behind the butchery of the new Jem And The Holograms comic is, they better have a seat — because this new blasphemous version is so NOT cute! The “modernized” comic is set to be released in March of 2015 and the publisher says:

Rather than follow the classic storyline of Jerrica being in charge of Starlight Music, she is now a talented musician suffering from stage fright. Something left behind by her father will help her overcome her fear. One presumes it’s Synergy, but who knows.
The initial issue will come with 5 different covers advertised as Rainbow Foil Covers, with one cover devoted to each member of the Holograms (minus Raya!!), and the 5th as a collective group shot. Issue #2 will follow the same general idea, this time with 4 covers, devoted to the Misfits (presumably minus Jetta).

Will you be checking out the new version of Jem once it hits stores? Or should they just let the real Queen Sienna D’enema muthaf*ckin take over and show them how it’s really muthafuckin done?:

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!! OMG, first look at the EYES and HAIR of new ‘Jem and The Holograms’ live-action movie cast members !!

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I can already tell this new live-action Jem & The Holograms movie is gonna be a painful hot mess, and after seeing that it’s produced by Justin Bieber’s manager (maybe he should just focus on managing Justin Bieber. Looks as if he could use it…) — any remaining hope I had for the film adaptation of it has sort of slithered down the drain for me. Anyway, according to SPIN, The Holograms have been cast and are as follows:

Jem — street name Jerrica Benton — will be played by Nashville star Aubrey Peeples (also: Grey’s Anatomy, Necessary Roughness). Her keytar-wielding sister Kimber will come courtesy of Stefanie Scott (Disney’s A.N.T. Farm). The role of purple-haired guitarist Shana goes to Aurora Perrineau of Pretty Little Liars. And the blue-haired guitarist Aja will be Hayley Kiyoko (The Fosters). The movie is being produced by Justin Bieber manager Scooter Braun, and directed by G.I. Joe guy Jon M. Chu.

I mean… to be honest, I feel like nothing they could make would have the appeal or top the genius of Sienna D’enema‘s take on Jem & The Holograms. Ever since Jiz! came into my life, I’ll never really see Jem the same way again! Talk about the voice of a GENERATION!

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