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!! OMG, How Elegant: Mrs. The Countess Luann De Lesseps releases her first single !!

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Kah-dooz to Mrs. The Countess Luann De Lesseps! Never one to be outdone for crass self-promotion/humiliation, Mrs. the Countess has become the latest “Real Housewife” to release a shockingly bad dance single. It’s sure to start busting up the charts a la Kim Zolciak’s Tardy For the Party before you can say prostitution whore!
Shall we take a listen?
CLICK TO PLAY:


It’s called Elegance is Learned. How true! Little known fact: Mrs. The Countess majored in Elegance at the University of Phoenix! As to speculations about where she studied music, let’s just say that she makes Kim Zolciak sound like Edith Piaf…
(Via DListed)

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!! OMG, Tori Spelling needs a gay !!

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Tori Spelling is getting a talk show and she needs a homosexual friend to be Jim J. Bullock to her Tammy Faye. Or, as the producers are putting it, Will to her Grace. Well if it’s the second, that should be easy: they just need to find a glassy-eyed fop with a smooth, shiny bump where his penis should be! Are u that someone?
Reports the LA Times:

ABC is creating a daytime talk show for Spelling and a co-host to be determined… The program, which is in the very early stages of development, would feature Spelling and a male co-host who would basically serve as Spelling’s best friend forever. The network is looking for a “Will & Grace” vibe between Spelling and her as-yet-undiscovered BFF.Who knows, maybe finding a co-host can be its own reality show for Spelling.

Who would have ever predicted that of all the 90210 kids, Donna would be the one who would go on to have an actual career? Poor Andrea Zuckerman must be so jealous right now!
[LA Times via Jezebel]

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!! OMG, How Judgey: The Real Housewives of New Jersey !!


The wig-wearing, bronzer-slathered gas-guzzling gutter skanks classy paragons of New Jersey virtue known as The Real Housewives of New Jersey have seen this Jersey Shore business and they would like you to know that they do not approve of Snooki and her ilk ruining their state’s sterling reputation!

“We shouldn’t be telling our kids, ‘You get drunk, make out in a hot tub, you get your own TV show,'” Dina Manzo told reporters Tuesday afternoon during a teleconference. Not one to stay silent, Teresa Giudice weighed in: “Does that really happen in the Jersey shore? Yes. … It’s not something I’d want my children to watch.”
Teresa, a mother of four young girls, added that — like Snooki, The Situation and the rest of the sexed-up Jersey Shore gang — she once had a sharehouse on the Shore, but she “never made out with a girl in a hot tub.”

Never mind the pot and the kettle– this is more like Heidi Fleiss calling Amy Fisher the prostitution whore! (The Jersey Housewives pick up the baton from the Bethenny, Jill, Ramona Alex and Mrs. The Countess on May 3.)
[Crushable]

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!! OMG, It’s Coming Back: Friday Night Lights !!


The gayest-ever show about football is returning to the airwaves! Although Friday Night Lights has been known to go completely off the rails for long stretches, it has never skimped on the mancandy. My wish for the upcoming season is for dream daddy Coach Taylor to start an illicit and highly nude homosexual relationship with one of his young football-playing charges and for Connie Britton’s Tami Taylor to embark on a career as a drug addicted showgirl. Will my dreams become reality? I have no idea, but maybe the above preview for season four will give some clues. (But probably not.)
UPDATE: Oopsy! This promo is actually for the run of the fourth season that will begin airing May 7 on NBC. It already aired on DirecTV!

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