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!! OMG, a contest: I <3 SOAPS with 'OLTL' autographed script !!

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Calling all soap opera fans: Enter to win the I <3 SOAPS Sweepstakes! The beloved daytime dramas All My Children & One Live To Live are back in brand-new half-hour episodes from Prospect Park’s The Online Network streaming daily on Hulu, Hulu Plus and iTunes beginning April 29!
One lucky grand prize winner will win a One Life To Live script autographed by the entire cast and a special “Who Says You’ve Only Got One Life to Live?” t-shirt. Four runners-up will win a “Who Says You’ve Only Got One Life to Live?” t-shirt.
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THE CONTEST: What is the worst act of treachery that has ever occurred on either One Life to Live or All My Children? Be convincing.
THE RULES: Please email your contest entry along with your full name, North American or UK shipping address, and telephone number to [email protected]. All personal information is collected in accordance with our privacy policy.
Our favorite response will win a One Life To Live script autographed by the entire cast and a special “Who Says You’ve Only Got One Life to Live?” t-shirt. Four others will receive the t-shirt. The winning entries will be announced on our Facebook page next week.
BONUS: After the jump, watch new episode teasers for both shows.

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!! OMG, Fish You Were Here: The Face of Furry Creek !!


Now that Naomi Campbell has finished announcing herself as the winner of ‘The Face’, it’s time to go fishing for ‘the other Face’, this time for a small Canadian mountain town known as Furry Creek; although these hopefuls look like they are partaking in the spinoff series called ‘FACE LOOKS LIKE A FURRY CREEK’.

Starring, among others, Cotton Venus; head of Vancouver drag slags ‘House Of Venus’ and directed by Mark Kenneth Woods, the series begins on OUT.TV Canada on June 3rd.

…and if everything goes tits-up for the contestants, well I guess they’ll be without a spanking paddle up FURRY SHIT CREEK, I know I’ve been there on holiday before!

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!! OMG, glitch please!: Flying Lotus for ‘Adventure Time’ !!

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When I first watched Cartoon Network’s ‘Adventure Time’, it was the first time since Pokémon that I’d wanted to “catch ’em all”; it’s poopie and witty and you will trip on your ballsack or tattyflaps whilst watching it…favourite character? oh the Japanese Korean flying worm unicorn girlfriend thingy!
Flying Lotus is the ultimate bedroom stoner musician so it’s not so surprising he just made a tune for the show entitled ‘About That Time/ /A Glitch is a Glitch’, I can just imagine him chomping down on Twinkies and Cheetos and watching back-to-back Adventure Time/Pokémon/Teletubbies re-runs.

I’m hoping Flying Lotus will soon collaborate with Michelle Obama on an single entitled ‘LYING FLOTUS’ with Michelle doing doo waps over a squidgy white house beat. Whilst we wait longingly for this to never happen you can join Princess Bubblegum in the Land of Ooo by downloading the episode that features the car-toon HERE.
[via PMA]

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!! OMG, “na naa nanana naaaa”: Clarissa Explains what she can’t Explain !!


Our favourite dorky darling, Clarissa Darling explained all kinds of things to us back in the 1990s, but she never explained her ludicrous fashion sense, which made me always want a spin-off series called ‘Clarissa Explains what the Hell she’s Wearing, and explains that maybe her frumpy patchwork-print long-skirted Mom dressed her this morning’, or something of that sort.
Well according to Entertainment Weekly, Clarissa is tentatively set to release a novel in the fall of 2014, and is called ‘Things I Can’t Explain’, so maybe it’ll expand on her earlier clothing catastrophes after all:

“the novel will follow 23-year-old Clarissa as she tries to carve out a career as a journalist and deals with the obstacles toward becoming a real adult: finding and keeping a job in a turbulent economy, the luxury of a first apartment without roommates, figuring out how to deal with parents all over again, and unexpected feelings for a really cute guy who — of course — has an on-and-off again girlfriend.”

“Waaay cooool”
[via papermag]

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!! OMG, watch all your favourite shows, right meow: Sidereel’s been hijacked by cats !!

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OK, so I went onto Sidereel last night, obviously not to watch illegally streaming episodes of ‘Real Housewives of Vancouver’ or the finale of Naomi Campbell’s ‘The Face’ or anything like that.
It would appear that the site has been hijacked by paddy paws who have given the pages a bit of a MEOWKOVER…like seriously. I figured it was an April Fools thingy, but then today it remains. With titles on offer such as ‘How I Meow’t Your Mother’ and ‘Tabbycat Takes Over’ [or maybe this is a special episode where hairmazing bull-dyke Tabatha takes over a kitty grooming salon?!].
One VERY disgruntled user of the site Kelly Taylor wrote an angry complaint entitled ”I’m sad,confused, frustrated and down right ANGRY!”…OK dear, calm down, it’s not that bad, I think you may need to re-asses your white girl problems, this is the sort of quote one would expect to hear in relation to like genocide or homophobic hate crimes or some such important thing, not a few kitty-cutouts and occasional “meows” on your source for daily episodes of ‘Jersey Shore’…get a grip lady, or I’ll cat scratch you.
Sidereel’s reason for the cat burglary ? “because cats!”…oh, OK, fair enough I guess.

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