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!! OMG, this girl’s ring is on fire: Phosphorescent’s ‘Song For Zula’ !!


Matthew Houck churns out albums in the same way as normal humans toot out farts, like constantly, all the time, big smelly ones from the depths of his musical stomach.
His 6th album Muchacho was written “in the middle of a bit of a [domestic] freak-out,” when he escaped New York in favour of a beach-hut on Mexico’s Yucatan Peninsula.
Of the lyrics to mesmeric ‘Zula’, Houck told NPR that they came out so quickly he didn’t even realize he had dropped in a reference to ‘Ring of Fire’:

“Some say love is a burning thing, that it makes a fiery ring”

Sounds like a case of Mexican seafood poisoning, so I guess the shackles in the video represent being chained to the toilet, I knew I recognised that look of panic on the woman’s face, I could just tell from her sweaty hair she was a DOUBLE-ENDED GUSHER!

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!! OMG, long weekend: Azealia Banks’ No Problems !!


Azealia finally RUpologised to Angel Haze over whatever it was that something something something or whatever…well at least this fun song came out of all that pop plop that happened, and now we have a video filmed at ULTRA Festival in Miami, where skanks and dudes go to erm dump their fashion-fails and dress as earth-godesses [who btw just happen to be scantily clad, “I’m not a skank I’m ‘free-spirited'”…you know that sort of thing].
Just like Azealia I also don’t want no problems, I’m only saying their skanks because I’m jealous of their boogie and all the straight guys they get to bonk and lick. There’s nothing hotter than a sunburned straight dude with MDMA plate-eyes and a FERAL PENCHANT FOR FOAMY BEVERAGES!
Although I won’t let the trashion fashion go, so here’s LAWeekly’s ‘The 13 Most Hardcore Ravers at Ultra’ otherwise known as ‘Gifs to make you Gip’!
[thanks Bear!]

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!! OMG, Golden Globes’ gummy gals: Actresses Without Teeth !!

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:s Nicole?! :s
I guess the tooth fairy turned into a celeb-obsessed greedy little lady, or maybe she gets more bucks for her plucks, when she provides celebrity molars, either way these girls are looking a tad cracky since their top rows went AWOL.
Click below to see what it’s like when various other actresses do it just like Gra’ma, when she forgets to put her dentures in for Christmas dindins and she’s trying to pull CHUNKS OF TURKEY SKIN with her gums!
So lucky that Auntie Pantie sat you right opposite Gra’ma, so you can see right down her GOBBLE-GOB!

[[ OMG, there’s more: JUMP IN to read the rest ]]

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!! OMG, puss puss: Paris Kain’s ‘Octo-Pussy’ !!


We started Tuesday with the 8-legged puss, so we’ll end with some more ‘Octo-Pussy’:
Wearing a Rick Owens SS 2011 leather shoulder-dress [stolen no-doubt from URSULA’S UNDERWATDROBE] artist Taiana Giefer plays with her Octo-Pussy for –Alexander Wang collaborator- Paris Kain’s new short.
He had this to say of the mystical puss-puss:

“In tarot, the octopus represents insight and esoteric vision. It is in constant motion, waxing and waning to the moon and guided by its goddess the High Priestess”

[via nowness]

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!! OMG, Obedience killed the cats: かご猫 Blog !!

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I held my breath for a whole cat-with-balanced-fruits minute when Mr Mallard sent me THIS yesterday morn.
I couldn’t compute how still and obedient the kitties were with FRUIT TOTEMS upon their paws. I mean, we do this with a friend’s cat, put stuff on her back until she notices, but she’s cross-eyed and has cat-dementia whereas these cats just seem calm and refined.
Click below to see the very same cats in boxes, heads-on-the-chopping-block style and also a video of Mr Corporal Cat with two-tone-bowl-helmet…yes sir, RIGHT AWAY SIR!

[[ OMG, there’s more: JUMP IN to read the rest ]]

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