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!! OMG, haute sex: Chanel condoms !!

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When brainstorming the slogan for its brand of condoms, Chanel could have gone with “Cover your stump before you pump” or even “Protect your rump before you hump” — but instead the catchline is merely: “Keep it classy.” Oh, the rich. So minimalist.
Also, a pack of twelve is $279.

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!! OMG, this isn’t a joke! Zeb Atlas ‘sings’ and ‘dances’ !!


Pearly Gates’ video for Stop For Love hit YouTube this week and — to the surprise of anyone who’s even heard of Pearly Gates — featured “the world’s leading gay icon” Zeb Atlas…as the straight male love interest.
Now, Zeb’s returned the guest starring favor by featuring Pearly Gates in his Diana Ross’ remake Love Hangover. Wait, Zeb Atlas has a music career? But in case any of you are already mid-snicker, Pearly Gates has this to say:

“The intention of this project (and Zeb will agree with this) is not to proclaim to the world that he is a singer but to create a product that fans will enjoy visually as well as musically by ensuring that Zeb is aiming to be nothing but himself. So, you queens out there, please refrain from making any bitchy comments and just sit back, chill and enjoy Zeb.”

Noted. And ignored.
(via After Elton)

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!! OMG, lost my appetite: Deep-dish pizzapits !!

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Perusing Craigslist personal ads in the depths of your boredom is a lot like slowing down when you pass a car wreck — you welcome the reminder that, all things considered, you’re actually doing ok. At least you aren’t tangled up in a fender-bender or, say, looking for love in emotionally vacant places.
But then there are those posts that are ten-car pileups, like this one. You don’t gawk because it says something about you. That shit is just crazy. Pizzapits? PIZZAPITS?! No, Papa John, keep your pepperoni away from me.

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