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!! OMG, Beware: Juice boxes and chips are turning your children gay !!


Syndicated radio host Alex Jones has a newsflash: juice boxes and kettle chips are part of a conspiracy to turn America’s schoolchildren gay!I knew my mom always had a sinister glint in her eye when she was slipping that Capri Sun into my lunch sack. What, you thought it was called fruit punch because it’s made of fruit?!
(Actually, as insane as this person is– and while I don’t think being gay has anything to do with a sudden urge to go “plant rose gardens”– I have to agree that the chemicals in packaged foods are probably pretty bad for you. But let’s not let that get in the way of making fun of him!)
[Via Joe.My.God.]

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!! OMG, How Cheesy: Jared Leto’s pre-Angela model shoot !!

UPDATE: Jared Leto has asked (via a lawyer) that we remove these embarrassing photos from the site. We had to comply, but they really are gold and we recommend that you seek them out wherever you can find them.
If you thought it was impossible that Jordan Catalano, sometimes considered (by me) to be the most beautiful man ever to walk Our Planet Earth, could ever look bad, well you obviously weren’t paying attention to when he got fat to play John Lennon’s assassin. Or when he got cornrows. Or even to this year’s VMA’s when he looked more like Ellen Degeneres than Ellen herself did. I mean, he’s looked plenty bad plenty of times since his dreamy and teen-loin-stirring turn as Angela Chase’s object d’amour. But who knew that he sometimes looked terrible before he met Angela, too?
Well now you know, thanks to this amazing/horrifying pre-My So-Called Life hair model shots. (And let’s face it– these pictures really just go to show that even with atrocious styling, amateurish photography and a few zits on his chest, Jared Leto is still the most beautiful man on the planet.)

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!! OMG, Busted: Saxby Chambliss staffer is homophobic internet crank !!

Newsflash to readers and commenters: you have an IP address! I know it’s hard to wrap your head around, but it’s a special little number that sort of vaguely identifies your point of origin when you visit a website. When you comment, your IP address is saved with the comment, and the website’s administrator (hey, that’s me!) can get a general idea of where the comment came from. If you happen to be writing from the office of a US Senator, it might say something like: “ISP: US Senate.” Uh-oh, Senate staffers… that means you!
Here’s the exchange that happened yesterday on gay blog Joe.My.God., in the comments of a post about Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. :
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Well, well, well– it seems that a Saxby Chambliss (R – GA, shocker!) staffer is not only an evil homophobe but a stupid idiot who doesn’t know how the internet works. And it’s your beautiful tax dollars who pay his(?) salary, (American) readers!
[via This is FYF]

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!! OMG, Google Her: Kim Zolciak !!


Real Housewife of Atlanta, wig peddler and Tardy For the Party chanteuse Kim Zolciak has a new command. GOOGLE ME. And because she’s like that, Ms. Kim is issuing her orders in the form of a catchy song. This above YouTube clip just a sneak preview for those too impatient to wait for the full dancefloor epic. But it’s enough to know that it’s going to be good!
(The song also serves as a helpful pnemonic for those too stupid to remember how to spell “Google.” It’s G-O-O-G-L-E. Thanks, Kim!)

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!! OMG, A Pinch of Ginger: The angry redhead is now the Mad Hatter !!


Uh… kids today! Shit, this kind of thing makes me feel like my grandma. In my day we didn’t have vlogs, and if we had webcams they were used for sexual jerkoff purposes only. None of this dressing up as an Alice in Wonderland characters for no good reason nonsense!
(I wonder if his girlfriend is the March Hare?)
[Via VideoGum]

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