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!! OMG, How much wood would a woodchuck chuck? Who cares because...ICE-CREAM! !!
How much ice-cream would a woodchuck munch
If a woodchuck could munch tastey creamy treats?
He would eat, he would, as much as he could,
And lick as much as a woodchuck would
If a woodchuck could gobble up icecream.
This woodchuck would not chuck wood, he would -however- chuck vanilla flavoured ice-cream cones though, his rotary waffle nibbling technique is marvellous, he doesn't even squidge a dollop on the floor or anything like that, just neat and tidy and methodically munch-nibbles his cone-shaped dairy treatsicle.
[via papermag]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Monday, April 22, 2013
comments: 1 | category: Cute
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!! OMG, Fish You Were Here: The Face of Furry Creek !!
Now that Naomi Campbell has finished announcing herself as the winner of 'The Face', it's time to go fishing for 'the other Face', this time for a small Canadian mountain town known as Furry Creek; although these hopefuls look like they are partaking in the spinoff series called 'FACE LOOKS LIKE A FURRY CREEK'.
Starring, among others, Cotton Venus; head of Vancouver drag slags 'House Of Venus' and directed by Mark Kenneth Woods, the series begins on OUT.TV Canada on June 3rd.
...and if everything goes tits-up for the contestants, well I guess they'll be without a spanking paddle up FURRY SHIT CREEK, I know I've been there on holiday before!
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Friday, April 19, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Delicious
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!! OMG, temporary secretary: Willam for Frontiers !!
Willam's currently working on a book which she promises is going to be "a little bit of Sedaris combined with Butt magazine and some Allure". She's working hard on it as she insists she doesn't agree with the "highway robbery" of other queens selling overpriced merch to their fans.
She sat down with Frontiers to discuss her seventh grade book review of RuPaul's Autobiography which her teacher refused to mark, compensating for an 'imperfect' face with a rockin' body clad in labels, and hanging out in Dubai 'Sex and The City' style with Detox and Vicky Vox:
"Here's the thing about Dubai...Detox is going to get beheaded. I'm gonna get sold into a harem, hopefully for rubies, and Vicky is gonna get a fatwa--and yes, that is also a weight-related joke...My burqa is knee-length, so I should be fine,"
Read the inteRu in it's entirety HERE and see Willam's face-compensating body after the jump.
[[OMG there's more! JUMP IN and read the rest]]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Thursday, April 18, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Tranny Fierceness
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!! OMG, don't be sorry: logitech4873's 'I'm So Sorry' !!
When Louis CK said "suck a bag of dicks", I feel like this video gives a pretty good visualisation of what that might look like.
Norwegian Youtube user 'logitech4873' uploaded it a few days back, with the description:
"I'm so sorry for spending 62 hours rendering this shit. I really am"
Don't be sorry, what's more worth your while than rendering a pile of fleshy peens all shiny and glistening?
Like the FLESHERMAN emptying his net of a days catch of cock-fish!
The eel peen is the one I'm after, I thought it was going to fall forever, and it would satisfy the appetite of even the most ravenous of flesh-mongering bottom boys.
[via bullett]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Wednesday, April 17, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Artumnal
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!! OMG, first off...: 'Sofia The First' will make you 'funny' !!
You may thing that Sofia is a little barch, you may think she's a total fag hag or like me you might just be totes jealous of her HOT CHIC KNEE-LENGTH VIOLET NUMBERS of which she has many [which then convinces me she is a little baarch and a total fag hag].
I think I'd much rather buy my son a 'Sabrina the Teenage Bitch' dvd because at least then he'd have fierce powers and a cute talking cat to aspire to, but I was touched by the middle finger flipping of the old [probably ex-Disney Princess] granny who bought Sam a 'Sofia The First' dvd last Friday in Walfart Walmart.
[via HuffPost]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Tuesday, April 16, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Cute
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!! OMG, the vision of Divinity: Jeffrey Schwarz interview !!
Jeffrey Schwarz has directed over 100 films; documentaries about movies, films on films, covering the making as such classics as 'Footloose' [this amounts to several films, obsessed much?!], 'Bewitched' and 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre'.
His in-depth documentary on the queen of all queens, Divine, premiered this year at SXSW and features previously unseen photos and videos provided by Divine's mother Frances Milstead who was still alive when Jeffrey was collecting together his material for what he describes as "the ultimate 'it gets better' story".
Schwarz sat down with Afterelton to discuss his dream of one day making a Divine Biopic, his search for film-funding sugar-daddies or "donor angels", and remembering that John [Waters] and Divine, were creating "movies for gay people who didn't get along with other gay people":
"Today's queers need to remember people like Divine and the people on the fringes who made it easier for the rest of us."
True dat!
You can read the whole interview HERE [I promise only a single mention of canine excrement] and you can browse the North American film screening deets, after the jump.
[[OMG there's more! JUMP IN and read the rest]]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Friday, April 12, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Filmongous
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!! OMG, CHEW have to laugh: 'Chewie Here, Chewbacca There' !!
Chewbacca is my kind of guy; big, hairy, really good at fixing things and cuddly by nature, so every time I hear that "cccrrrrroooooaaaauuuuuwwww" noise, I melt inside, and stiffen on the outside at the thought of hopping on the CHEW-CHEW TRAIN and riding that hairy ass all night long until we make Chewie babies.
This video is basically Chew-porn, Chew-gasms with pictures of fluffy animals and household apparatus on top, it's hitting all my domestique sci-fantasy pleasure centres.
Chewie is that CHU...won't you come in here and fix that Chewie tap and that cupboard door is Chewing too...wont Chew fix that for me...THANK CHEW!
[via laughingsquid]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Thursday, April 11, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Funny
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!! OMG, Beyoncé's gotta Knowles: She is looking like a vase sometimes !!
Buzzfeed just fed us something that we are gagging on and we are now blowing up chunks of MING DYNASTY ROAMING TIGER CERAMIQUE!
Follow the jump to see such looks as an Oscar "small town aunt's mantlepiece" vase dress and a Met Gala "just like the gifts you'd find on special offer in the back pages of a doll collectors magazine" gown!
Ooh girl, you Knowles they're not wrong!
[[OMG there's more! JUMP IN and read the rest]]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Tuesday, April 9, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Fashionistic
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!! OMG, bitchy [Mc] Queen!: Ziggy phones Alexander !!
A couple of weeks back we gave you a preview of the 'David Bowie is...' exhibition at the V&A, featuring Alexander McQueen's shiny Union Jack coat from Bowie's 1997 'Earthling' album cover.
In honor of this, Dazed&Confused dusted off a phone conversation between Bowie and Mcqueen from back in the late 90s whilst Alexander was staying at the country home of friend and muse Isabella Blow.
Bowie being arguably the most influential musician and McQueen respectively the most important fashion designer of our time, this interview is well worth a readypoo as Alexander discusses his disdain for the theatre -it "bores [him] shitless"-, walking around the streets in his sister's bra and getting "the best blowjob ever" from a Parisian aristocrat.
"Bowie: Armani says, 'Fashion is dead'. McQueen: Oh, so is he... I mean, God... Bowie: Now you sound like Versace... McQueen: He's close to dead...the man was a bloody window dresser. What does he know? Bowie: Do you think that what he's really saying is that maybe... McQueen: He's lost it..."
What a bitchy [Mc]Queen!
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Monday, April 8, 2013
comments: 0 | category: Fashionistic
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!! OMG, panty hoes: Poochies posing in pantyhose !!
"Are you looking at my ass?"
This is what happens when y'all go for your Sunday dinner at 'Chuck e Cheese' and nobody's around, those doggy-ass girls sneak into your panty drawer and lounge about with their faces down and their asses up, because that's the way they like to pup!
Jump in to see the rest of those hairy-ass panty-hoes.
Damn do these canines know how to accessorise; pup on a pair of Louboutins, a FUZZY ANKLETTE or a pair of mid-calf zebra-Uggs and these girls are ready to:
"WORK ME DOGDAMNIT"
[[OMG there's more! JUMP IN and read the rest]]
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posted by Duncan Alexander on Friday, April 5, 2013
comments: 2 | category: Cute
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