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!! OMG, Rejoice: Amanda Woodward Returns to Melrose Place !!


Homosexuals around the world are dancing in the streets at the news that Her Majesty Heather Locklear is returning to the crappy new Melrose Place as bitch goddess Amanda Woodward! I’m not sure anything can save this show from lame-o yawnsiness, but another HANDYMAN INCIDENT like in the clip above would be a great start.
(Via The Awl)

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!! OMG, How Confused: Sleeping Doggie !!

It’s a fine fall day (here in Brooklyn at least) and you know what that means: time to stay inside all afternoon chain-smoking and watching funny videos of dogs and monkeys. I usually try not to post two animal videos in one day but I’m making an exception today because this sleepwalking dog might be one of my favorites ever. He kind of reminds me of a boyfriend I once had. The owners of the video have disable embedding, but trust me that you will be very happy if you watch it on YouTube.
(Thank you to EDG for the tip.)

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!! OMG, Baby Panda gets a check-up !!


I am still addicted to the Panda Cam sidebar gadget, so I was delighted today when Kevin sent me the link to this video of the cutest little unnamed baby getting a routine check-up. Listen to his little squeaky noises!
What do you think his name should be?
I’ve posted two more adorable stills from Panda Cam after the jump. The cameraperson was getting creative today, zooming in his adorable little yawns.

[[ OMG, there’s more: JUMP IN to read the rest ]]

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!! OMG, They’re Naked: Dieux du Stade 2010 !!

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There’s seriously no happier season here at OMG Blog’s secret headquarters/sex-lair than when pictures from the new Dieux du Stade start leaking. This year, the world’s nudest and sexiest French Rugby players are back and better than ever, displaying their ample bosoms, muscular bottoms, and yes– get excited, guys!– even some HOT RUGBY WEINER. Well, HALF-WEINER, but still. Vive la France!
A highly-curated selection of the NSFW pictures is after the jump.

[[ OMG, there’s more: JUMP IN to read the rest ]]

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!! OMG, How Convenient: The SOM !!

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For years, I’ve been on a quest for an elaborate motorized sex-machine that can double as a kitchen appliance. Duh! Who hasn’t? Cause then if your mom comes over and is like, “what’s that elaborate sex-machine looking thing over there?” you can just be like, “Oh, no worries– it’s just an egg-beater! Let’s make a cake!” No fuss, no muss, and no embarrassment!
Well finally the Japanese have come through for me (again!) with the SOM. Available in both a men’s and “lady’s” configuration, the Som allows you to jack/jill-off totally hands free. That means you can get your rocks off while you’re grouting your shower, having dinner, or even conducting surgery. Then all you do is wipe it down a little and use it to whip up something tasty.
It makes a great gift for double amputees and those with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and it’s extra-great for men whose penis is the size of a ten-year-old’s thumb because that seems to be as big as it comes.
A million thanks to de Cosmos for cluing me in to this great contraption. Get it here!

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