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!! OMG, welcome to the new millennia: James St. James’ open letter to the newly released Michael Alig !!

Prisoner #97A6595 aka Michael Alig, the murderous club kid who offed his dealer with some draino back in the 90’s was released this week after serving 17 of his 18 years in jail, and one of his dear friends from his time before the slammer has penned a touching open letter welcoming him to the outside world in the new century, and updating him on what to expect. Check out James St. James‘ letter after the jump!

[[ OMG, there’s more: JUMP IN to read the rest ]]

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!! OMG, hide your dealers, hide your Drano: Infamous ‘club kid’ turned murderer Michael Alig could soon be free !!

Michael Alig, the man who rose to fame as a well-known promoter/club kid in the 90’s by throwing wild parties at places like the Limelight, is in the chokey and currently serving 10-20 years for the murder of his drug dealer Andre “Angel” Melendez back in 1996. The 2003 film Party Monster starring Macauley Culkin as Alig, chronicled Alig‘s rise and fall, and he has since garnered a younger cult following on places like Tumblr around his twisted ‘nightlife-legacy’.
However — if PageSix has got it right, it may happen that Michael could be released from jail very soon:

“I go to my next hearing in a week . . . wish me luck,” Alig wrote in a holiday card to a pal last month. “If they release me I’d be home in January! I get a response in about 20 days . . . can’t wait to see everyone again,” he added.

Oh shiiit! That gives us, like, a one-day window before February hits! If Alig does get out of the chokey, we think he’s gonna be most pisssed about the fact that New York no longer has a nightlife!

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!! OMG, if you see this man, do not approach him: Texas Police Release World’s Least Helpful Police Sketch !!

Whoever the police sketch artist is over at Texas’s Lamar Country sheriff’s department, needs a RAISE! Or a Gatorade and a greasy hamburger, cause they’re drunk. Either works. The authorities released this incredibly accurate rendering of their suspect this week when they attempted to track down a man who held up two women at knife point. I think Terence or Philip from South Park may have some explaining to do because according to Metro:

The suspect the police sketcher was trying to draw fits the victims’ description of a man ‘6 foot tall or a little taller, approximately 25 to 30 years old with no or very thin facial hair, and a muscular build.’
The description adds: ‘His nose was straight with no flare in the nostrils. He has short black hair and a round face, with tattoos covering both arms and a tattoo on the left side of his neck.’

This however, has yet to beat the gorgeous police sketch Portuguese authorities provided regarding the disappearance of Madeline McCann:
e-fit-5.jpgI feel safer already!
[via death&taxes via metro.uk]

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!! OMG, presenting Cuba’s newest jailhouse bottom b*tch: Russian Gay-Basher Arrested in Cuba !!

You may have heard of Maxim “The Cleaver” Martsinkevich, a Russian fascist who filmed himself torturing gays on webcam (including this former Ukrainian X-factor contestant), then uploaded the videos to the internet. Well, dude fled to Cuba and it looks like they’re not taking any of his shit, because according to The Bilerico Project:

Russia was informed by Cuban police of the arrest of Maxim Martsinkevich through Interpol, the Russian Interior Ministry said in a statement.
More widely known under his nickname of Tesak, or machete, Martsinkevich was arrested in absentia by a Russian court last month on extremism charges. Martsinkevich said during a January 8 interview that the criminal charges against him were orchestrated by Russia’s “pedo-lobby,” and that he did not intend to return to Russia, according to Russian tabloid Life News that has close links to the security services.
The details of Martsinkevich’s extradition were currently being finalized, Russia’s Investigative Committee said in a statement Saturday.
In a January 9 post on his website, Martsinkevich wrote that he had flown to Cuba from the Ukrainian capital of Kiev, via the German city of Frankfurt. In 2011, Martsinkevich founded the Occupy Pedophile vigilante group, which lured men to abusive meetings with false promises of sex with minors. The encounters were recorded and then posted online.
The group was also reported to target gay men, who were subjected to similar abusive treatment.

Quick tip: If you flee somewhere — don’t do a video post about the whereabouts of where you’re headed! I know, I KNOW! — it seems like an obvious thing to avoid — but you’d be surprised how stupid some people are! Also, it looks as if Russia has charged Maxim for his neo-Nazi/skinhead extremism, but not for his documented acts of violence against LGBT people, so…

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!! OMG, think of the children! Police Raid Justin Bieber’s House, Find Ecstasy And Xanax Party Underway !!

I absolutely refuse to belieb this! Apparently, the po-po raided Justin Bieber‘s home this week to gather evidence for a childish prank involving egg-throwing directed at his neighbour’s house, only to uncover an underground party ridden with heathen debauchery taking place — involving MOLLY and XANAX y’all! WOOOT WOOT! Never say never! According to PulseRadio:

Singer Justin Bieber’s house was recently raided by police, who upon entry, discovered drugs belonging to friend Lil Za, who was arrested on suspicion felony drug possession. Initially, the substance was reported to be cocaine, but is now believed to be Ecstasy and Xanax, though lab tests will be needed to confirm it. The police initially searched Bieber’s residence looking for surveillance footage that might serve as evidence the pop star was involved in an egg-tossing vandalism case that caused thousands of dollars in damage to a neighbour’s home. Damages were estimated at $20,000.
The suspect was identified as Xavier Smith, 20, who performs under the name Lil Za (pictured below). Smith was set to be released later Tuesday after posting a $20,000 bond, but while in the booking cell, he allegedly broke a telephone while trying to arrange his bond, and was then charged with felony vandalism for the phone incident, according to Los Angeles County Sheriff Sgt. Chad Waters, the watch commander at the Lost Hills Sheriff’s Station.

Now, my question here isn’t related to charges, but wondering which one of you will get on CafePress fast enough to make a mint on “FREE LIL ZA” shirts first?! Total goldmine! Thank me later!

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